In this episode, DJ promises Kimmy’s daughter that she can have her own room, forcing Jackson to move-in with his little brother–kind of like DJ and Stephanie moving in together once Jesse moved in.

Speaking of Jesse, John Stamos shows up and over hears Stephanie giving Jackson an “inspirational” talk. While he’s busy telling her what an amazing job she did with teaching the kid a valuable lesson, Jackson sneaks down the stairs (presumably to run away where he can live alone). As it turns out, Jackson sneaks into the backseat of Jesse’s LA-bound car.

Meanwhile, Stephanie and Kimmy don’t realize that they’ve lost a kid. (DJ has left them in charge while she takes care of a veterinarian emergency.) She comes home after getting a text from Jackson–Jesse discovered him in the car and no-doubt forced him to text his mom. And she’s all ticked off and calls a family meeting. And then they like decide to get along? I don’t know…this was literally the entire episode and I’m not really sure what the point was. This show is so, so bad. It makes Full House seem like cutting-edge comedy.

Very Special Lesson (according to DJ): Respect, Compromise, and Honesty.

Best Joke/Only Kind-Of Good Joke: “I changed so many of Michelle’s diapers, I feel like there were two of her.”

So in a Very Special Blog first, I’m combining two episodes into one post because “Moving Day” was the most boring thing on Earth. So this is “Funner House” and let’s hope that it lives up to that title:

Also, this is my last episode unless things get much better immediately. I know I said I would review all of these, but I am not a masochist. It’s fun to review things that are ridiculous, but I’m not down to talk about something that’s just plain boring.

Anyway, it is “girls night” so Kimmy, Stephanie and DJ go to a club, where they pick up Val and Maks Chmerkovskiy from Dancing with the Stars and decide to do some tequila shots. This is something that would not have happened on Full House and I’m interested to see how this plays out.

Then Macy Gray shows up! Where has she been? I missed her. This was my jam in 2000:

Apparently, Stephanie and Macy are like BEST friends. Um, but they only talk for 30 seconds. Wait, did Macy Gray literally just make a cameo on Fuller House?

In some kind of attempt to make Kimmy’s ex jealous (oh yeah, he’s at the club by the way), Stephanie and Macy Gray sing “Time of My Life” from Dirty Dancing while Kimmy and DJ dance kind of like Romy and Michele. It’s actually quite adorable and not nearly as awkward as whatever this was:

Also, if that’s really Jodie Sweetin singing, then we need to give Stephanie Tanner way more screen time. I’d rather hear her sing for 3 minutes each episode and not have to listen to as many stupid jokes.

Finally, Kimmy & DJ and Kimmy’s-Ex & His Lady Friend are the only couples left in the dance-battle. It all comes down to the final lift. Luckily, Val and Maks are there to jump in when DJ obviously cannot catch Kimmy. And it’s a perfect landing.

Best Joke: Kimmy’s Ex-Husband (to DJ while dancing)- “You’re way out of your league.”
DJ: “For your information, I’m in a league. A bowling league.”

Okay, this still sucks but it was definitely watchable. I legit enjoyed whatever that weird dance was. If you’re looking for the nostalgia factor then watch 1 and 3 and definitely don’t waste any time at all on episode 2.

P.S. The B-plot of this episode was Joey and the three kids having a full on silly string and slime war. So actually, I don’t think I hate Joey. But I do hate that woodchuck.