The Partridges are on tour in New Mexico and eating at a restaurant that has managed to defy the health inspector even though it is infested with flies. This is the best part of this show I think. I mean here they have David Cassidy but in the Partridge-Universe they are only famous enough to be playing at Shriner’s clubs and hotel bar’s.
So while they are having a nice family dinner in a disgusting diner, this teenage girl comes up to them and says she saw their bus outside and is hoping they could give her a lift to Albuquerque. (I feel like there’s going to be a song with Albuquerque in it now. Also, I had to use spell check twice to spell Albuquerque.)
Then this runway girl proceeds to tell them a ton of stupid lies about her past. She seriously is failing at subtlety. Also, she speaks strangely. I think young actresses must have still taken weird speaking lessons in the early 70’s. Anyway, when the stop to spend the night she bails. They’re not in Albuquerque (2nd time spelling it correctly on my own!) but she says she has some Basque shepher friends she needs to visit (ugh okay). And Shirley Jones is all like you’re full of it but I can’t make you stay if you don’t want to. When really it’s like, I’m sorry Shirley Jones, but at this point you’re probably endangering the welfare of a child and may need to call some type of local authority.
But it doesn’t take long for the police to find the Partridges. They tell the cop that they don’t know where she went. But if he had only checked their bus he would have found the missing girl sleeping and snuggling her guitar case. So bohemian. Anyway, Shirley sends the kids away to “freshen up” for the concert and tells the runway to chill with them. Meanwhile, she and Reuben go to the local police station to figure out what was going on. It turns out that this girl always runs away from her grandparents in Nebraska because she wants to live with her dad in Albuquerque. Upon learning that she’ll be locked in a holding cell until her grandparents can come collect her, Shirley asks if she can keep the girl with her and contact the grandparents herself. And you know, when you’re a small time family-band celebrity, you operate under a different set of rules.
So of course the police make Shirley responsible for this child and allow her to take her to Albuquerque to meet her grandparents. But when the Partridge kids say that the runaway has been taking a very long shower, Shirley barges in and finds the bathroom empty. So basically this is the stupidest most avoidable situation The Partridge Family has ever found themselves in. The producers must have really wanted to reuse that ghost town set because they have the family search all over this one-horse town for the runway (while a song about Albuquerque plays).
Anyway, they can’t find her until she literally runs in front of their bus. Then they chase her around Scooby-Doo style. Luckily, she doesn’t know how to drive a bus, and they corner her as she is trying to steal their ride. Anyway, it turns out that her dad is a super chill guy and her grandparents are kinda evil. They don’t like her dad (clearly they’re maternal grandparents) even though he hasn’t done anything to warrant this kind of behavior. Then they fight over her because they both love her so much and both want to give her a really wonderful home. (The Partridge Family can make even homeless children look rosy.) Shirley Jones is so awesome with her total lack of boundaries that she mediates between the squabbling family members and they agree that her dad can see her in the summer and on holidays. The End! No big “live performance” scene! Hope you liked that montage!
Very Special Lesson: When in doubt, use your favorite celebrities to solve all of your domestic issues.
I’ve recently gotten really into Hindsight on Vh1. It’s like a romcom + best friends + time travel. So like a really really great chicklit book that you can watch weekly. Also, the first episode is free on itunes if you want to test the waters. The best part (about the time travel) is that you get to chill in the 90’s without being like “AH THIS IS A THING FROM THE 90’s!” It’s sort of like Back to the Future in that regard. But honestly it’s probably mostly like Peggy Sue Got Married because it’s all about this woman who regrets her first marriage and passes out and wakes up in her own body but like 20 years prior. So yeah, I think this has been a really solid and coherent review. I hope you think so too.
asically, Zack takes the car out of the classroom and into the hallway and bribes Slater to teach him how to drive out of bounds. But Kelly walks up and wants to ride with Slater. (Zack has suspiciously asked to observe Slater’s teaching techniques from outside the vehicle). As it turns out, Zack has setup Belding to find Slater driving the car alone outside of the classroom. But Zack can’t get Kelly away from the car and basically shocks Slater into crashing. A golf cart. In a hallway. So maybe he isn’t that great of a driver.
Blossom really captures the whole Disney spirit. The episode is narrated by someone who sounds exactly like Snow White, and they even manage to make The Hall of Presidents interesting. Yep, seriously. The episode is the only one in the competition to take place at Disneyland, and (taking advantage of the smaller park size) they have all of the characters interact with the Disney characters/attractions in a very comprehensive way. But before we get into the nitty-gritty of the episode, does anyone find it odd that I’ve never once covered a Blossom episode on The Very Special Blog? I mean, she is the queen of very special episodes, right?
Blossom’s other brother (the not Joey Lawrence one) has brought his girlfriend to the park with them and every character in one of those full body-suits is into her. That’s really weird. I mean like fine if she’s soooo hot or whatever, but in that case shouldn’t the princes be trying to get with her? It’s like only Tigger and Dopey are into this girl and yet this dude gets jealous. Luckily, Abe Lincoln sets him straight in the most interactive Hall of Presidents ever in the history of halls and presidents. Six also gets with the Jungle Cruise guy who they happen to know from high school. Then they discover that their father is actually an Elvis impersonator performing center-stage at Tomorrowland. It’s boring and the only reason I’m pointing it out is that he makes out with Belle at the end of the episode in which there is a montage of make-outs. (There really was SO much kissing on this show.)
The overall plot of Boy Meets World, is a little more intricate, but that doesn’t make it better. Basically, Corey has been dating every single girl in school since he broke up with Topanga and that makes her not want to date him again. No shit. Anyway, he follows her to Disney World after she and two other classmates win a contest to study dolphins in Epcot. The other two classmates are 
Anyway, Topanga isn’t down for Corey’s stalking, and it’s only after he bumps into Stacey Keenan (we’ll see her later in Step by Step) who has decided to “hang back” alone after a guided tour (ugh yeah right) and becomes best friends with a sad dolphin who has lost her lover that he stops acting like a maniac. Corey realizes that he needs to chill out and let Topanga live her life, which is of course when she decides to date him again. Other than Corey/Shawn sleeping on Splash Mountain (so ridiculous), we see a few choice locals but nothing is really integrated into the plot. Almost by default, Blossom gets the point for plot. While Boy Meets World may be more intricate (sort of), I want to yell at it a lot.
The fashion point totally goes to Boy Meets World though. I would have expected Six to bring this one home for Blossom but she wears a really weird purple sweat-headband the entire episode and I’m not on board. Plus, Topanga’s outfits are rocking the entire week she is in Disney. I especially like her sea-foam green crop top and pants set. I can’t find a picture of that so here’s a picture of another one of her cute outfits:
I am totally torn about who to give the point to for overall integration of Disney setting. In Roseanne, you get to see more of the park locals, but they are pretty much just running through everything. Dan seems to be doing the Drink Around the World thing at Epcot, which is cool. But other than that they are mostly like “OH HEY LOOK AT THIS” and yet you barely see them on a ride. At one point, two of the characters even list all of the rides that they just did, but you don’t get to see those. Because of this, I think Family Matters has to win. Also, I like that they set a lot of plot development conversations at yummy restaurants. For example, when Stefan asks Carl for Laura’s hand in marriage (ugh) they are eating at that little outdoor cafe near the Brown Derby in Hollywood Studios. They also show Carl meeting a ton of characters, and he announces his plan to move the family to Orlando on The Tower of Terror just before the elevator drops…so yeah that’s some good setting integration right there.
After the mall, the sitters head on over to the hospital to throw a Christmas party for the kids. Everyone has markers and big pads of paper except for Mallory who gets the bitch job of sorting out the paper chain. Dawn wants to make Christmas cookies when she and Stacey babysit some obnoxious little boys, including little Pete from The Adventures of Pete and Pete. Dawn gets all self-conscious when she realizes that she’s totally disregarded Stacey’s diabetes. I don’t know how she forgot since Stacey mentions it like every other sentence.
Of course, Stacey ends up on the hospital because all she has eaten in the past day is cookies and chocolate. I knew (of) a couple of diabetic kids growing up and once they were old enough to realize that sugar could literally kill them, I never remember any of them tempted to gorge themselves on it, so I can only assume that this is some kind of risky adolescent rebellion on Stacey’s part. Drugs seem pretty hard to come by in Stonybrook, so it looks like everyone has to settle for a sugar high. Otherwise, this seems like a pretty serious cry for help. Why aren’t we talking about Stacey’s clearly self-destructive tendencies, instead of being all like “lay off the cookies, Stace.” Everything turns out okay though because Stacey gets to come to the party with all of the other children…which makes me wonder why the babysitters are only throwing a party for young children. Wouldn’t it suck to be thirteen and stuck in the hospital? I’m thinking that these girls don’t actually interact with their peers outside of this club. Would they even be friends if they weren’t also business associates?
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