September is rapidly drawing to a close and I’m already gathering the ingredients to make my costume “very” because two of my BFFs and I are dressing up as the Heathers!! This is just to say that if you work hard, put your mind to it, and subtly suggest only pop-culture themed costumes to your best friends for several years running, you too can make your dreams come true. And just in case you haven’t thought of anything for Halloween 2017, here are a few very special suggestions:
Liberty Bell & Zoya the Destroyer
Who knew the 80’s would feel so relevant right now? Russia. Thick Eyebrows. Proving your nation’s superiority in an all out battle in the wrestling ring!
How to do it on the cheap: Leotards, hairspray, bobby pins. If you’re doing it right, you’ll probably spend most of your money on hairspray.
Laura Palmer & Maddy Ferguson
Is this the right time to admit that I couldn’t get into new Twin Peaks? Like so not into it that I can’t remember if I made it through the second episode and I definitely canceled my Showtime free trial before it was even over. But I love OG Twin Peaks and this costume idea. This costume is for you and your doppelganger/twin spirit/look alike cousin or just about anyone you want rockin’ back inside your heart.
How to do it on the cheap: You already have brown/blonde hair and your friend has the opposite. It’s 2017 and big glasses are back, so one of you already has some. ONE OF YOU HAS TO GET BANGS. The other has to cut them like you’re in a college kid in your dormroom and you’re sure you can give haircuts like a professional.
The Little Mermaid & Flounder
If you are half-fish and your BFF is all-fish, then this costume is for you. If you feel like it’s the Mermaid Day Parade everyday, make this part of your world.
How to do it on the cheap: If you’re a mermaid and you don’t already know how to make this happen, then I suggest to you pick a different costume. Flounder should wear a blue tulle skirt, a yellow top, yellow tights, and make some stripes happen with painters tape.
All of the Murder Victims from Clue
So maybe you’ve got a lot of besties? If you’ve got a big crowd of people you platonically love and you want to go as a cohort, think of this as a macabre version of The Village People.
How to do it on the cheap: You should go all out on this one. Get real costumes. No one wants to see a singing telegram phoning it in.