This is a very special episode in which nothing happens. I’ve never seen anything quite like this. We have to learn a very important lesson and yet we see nothing at all about the consequence of our actions! Okay, wait let me back up.
Randy and Brad are canvassing the neighborhood in support of something that we only know as “the charity.” They are raising so much money for “the charity” that they realize how much stuff they could buy for themselves if they keep 50% of what they are supposed to be giving to “the charity.” Things go great and they end up buying a ton of stuff, while also getting their mom’s approval for working so hard to raise money for “the charity.” Not even when Jill finds the loot in Brad’s book bag do we learn the true name of “the charity.” Finally, when she and Tim confront Brad and Randy with they evidence, we learn they were supposed to be raising money to donate to the “Oak Lane Children’s Center” for children who have “next to nothing.”
Okay, so time to go down and meet some friendly orphans in order to learn the true meaning of Christmas, right? Nope. Brad and Randy come home from apologizing (off camera) and Randy is mad at Brad because Brad didn’t talk at all and Randy had to apologize for the both of them. But then Brad saves the day by pointing out some toys that he and Randy no longer play with and can donate to the center. Problem solved! In other news, Tim’s Christmas lights are blinding, and Al gets stuck in a fake chimney as Santa Claus while The Manhattan Transfer performs on Tool Time.
Very Special Christmas Lesson: If you steal money from charity, be sure to make up for it by giving the kids some of your old crappy toys for the holidays.
After the mall, the sitters head on over to the hospital to throw a Christmas party for the kids. Everyone has markers and big pads of paper except for Mallory who gets the bitch job of sorting out the paper chain. Dawn wants to make Christmas cookies when she and Stacey babysit some obnoxious little boys, including little Pete from The Adventures of Pete and Pete. Dawn gets all self-conscious when she realizes that she’s totally disregarded Stacey’s diabetes. I don’t know how she forgot since Stacey mentions it like every other sentence.
Of course, Stacey ends up on the hospital because all she has eaten in the past day is cookies and chocolate. I knew (of) a couple of diabetic kids growing up and once they were old enough to realize that sugar could literally kill them, I never remember any of them tempted to gorge themselves on it, so I can only assume that this is some kind of risky adolescent rebellion on Stacey’s part. Drugs seem pretty hard to come by in Stonybrook, so it looks like everyone has to settle for a sugar high. Otherwise, this seems like a pretty serious cry for help. Why aren’t we talking about Stacey’s clearly self-destructive tendencies, instead of being all like “lay off the cookies, Stace.” Everything turns out okay though because Stacey gets to come to the party with all of the other children…which makes me wonder why the babysitters are only throwing a party for young children. Wouldn’t it suck to be thirteen and stuck in the hospital? I’m thinking that these girls don’t actually interact with their peers outside of this club. Would they even be friends if they weren’t also business associates?
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